Door Opener Article

I am about to share a very unusual story a story –filled with intuitive insights, occurrences, and realizations about those aspects of human consciousness beyond what many individuals would consider normal.   These remarkable insights and experiences have had a major impact on my perception of events and circumstances as well as the very fabric of my life.   
Despite the joys and positive outcomes derived from my discovery of incredible intuitive gifts, I have not been spared serious life challenges.   I have experienced ups, and then downs, and then downs even lower than you can imagine.  Self-criticism, doubts, and fears were my constant companions.   The struggle to overcome these adversities has helped me to understand many life issues and enabled me to find solutions and healing.
     Since my past didn't provided me with the safety or encouragement to openly express what I felt and knew, I had to confront exposing secrets that had been deeply buried for most of my life.   What mattered most during this introspective mission was remaining connected to the powerful intuition I have learned to trust, and also keeping a vigilant focus on the guidance I receive daily.
Intuitive "insight" has helped me tremendously.  It’s done so by giving me the reassurance that all of us are in the same boat, floating down the same river, and often encountering equally rough waters along the way.   Although our problems appear to have different themes, they are the threads that link all of humanity.
These threads are universally familiar:  challenge, fear, emotional turmoil, and pain.   Regardless of the origins of our problems, each of us has a chance to work through challenges as we reach for the joy that we know in our hearts is our birthright.     Isn't life about evolving to a greater awareness so as to win the long-sought-after prize of happiness?    
     I believe that every individual is capable of attracting tailor- made opportunities designed to enable progress on the route to healing and bliss.  
Each of us will evolve in our own way, in our own time.  It will be up to the individual to determine what to do with the opportunities or choices he or she attracts.  In my personal quest for awareness and knowledge, I have been especially fortunate in making this spiritual journey empowered by my innate and uncanny intuitive gifts.     
     My personal observations and experiences all point to what I believe to be the truth about the universe and the uncertainties it presents.   I do not
profess academic expertise on the workings of the universe.  I do not hold degrees in theology, philosophy, ministry, science, or quantum physics.   And I realize that the nature of the universe has been a challenging topic dissected by philosophers, theologians, scientists, and ordinary human beings since the beginning of time.  I am most fortunate to have mt intuition as my scalpel.  Obstructions which lie on the path to truth are easily observed and deftly cut away.
Historically, what has been perceived as truth by esoteric teachers has been determined in numerous ways, in a multitude cultures and from a variety of sources.  In spite of some variations, I have noted that they share similar basic beliefs about the universe and a greater power.  The search for the ultimate truths of the universe and spirituality will undoubtedly continue until the end of time.   And as the methods of scientific proof and validation continue to evolve, we will gain a broader perspective and interpretation of universal truth.     I believe it is inevitable that our spiritual understanding of reality will evolve as well.  I have also been on this path most of my life.
     I have often been asked when I first recognized my gifts.  To pinpoint exactly when I first became aware of my intuitive abilities is difficult.    The first memory I have of an intuitive experience is of when I was in second grade.    It involved a very specific incident of a boy killed on his bicycle.   He lived in the neighborhood, and his death had an incredible impact on me.    I was unable to rationalize seeing him alive, playful and vibrant, one minute, and the next minute, seeing him dead.  Even today, when I close my eyes, I can still see his blue and white sneaker in the road.   I've never been able to explain why I knew something was about to happen to him.   I simply had the awareness that it was going to be bad, very bad.   At eight years old, I began to experience fear about what I knew.   The gifts were a burden, fear and confusion caused me to reject the information and sensations for a while.   Through rejection of my thoughts and feelings, it was easier for me to make believe that whatever I was sensing wasn't real.   I suppose that this was the best solution.   Due to fear and ignorance, I consequently haven't been able to recall very much from that time.
As an adolescent, I definitely didn't have the necessary emotional skills or life experiences to comprehend the magnitude of what was taking place.  The result was confusion, as well as a fair measure of guilt –everything my training had taught me, "It's all my fault."   I experienced my special access to information with discomfort and pain.  
Imagine walking into a room and immediately having a sense of someone else's anger or sadness.   As a child, without emotional tools, wouldn't you think a normal response would be is to feel responsible?   I know that I felt responsible for my parent's emotions and pain on many occasions during my youth and throughout the years I have also experienced their torment.  My relationship with my parents and my forcible sensing of their difficulties have had a major impact on the choices I've made, the friends I've had, and the feelings I've experienced or repressed.  
Developing my spirituality has helped me to understand why, and what,   happened and more importantly, what will happen in the future.   This knowledge provided me a safe refuge, for more than thirty years.  Spirituality and deep faith have created a foundation and an acceptance of why I do the things I do.   This deep understanding has helped my to appreciate the universe from a totally different perspective, expanding my thoughts, and thus my reality.    I have been able to sort through my unconscious issues to deal with the problems that had trapped me for so long.   These abilities have nurtured and helped to set me on the road to freedom. 
  During the late seventies and early eighties in Connecticut, there were very few seminars, books, or individuals to guide one's intuitive and spiritual development.   At least not that I knew of.   Actually, at the time psychic or intuitive readings and things of this nature were against the law. Connecticut still had old fortune telling laws on the books and they were enforced.   People were arrested and prosecuted for such practices.
Throughout the eighties, I spent my free time developing the connection to my intuitive ability and practicing my gifts as a medium, and the only way I was able to do so was to become a member of a spiritualist church.    Reflecting back on these years, I would have to say that I always felt more spiritually motivated and inquisitive about the universe apart from a connection to religion.  
     At some point along the way, I began to realize that I have an ability to interpret and simplify spiritual information.   Understanding the deeper meaning of the experience I have been involved in allowed me to add value and to develop a new perspective of my experience.   
Some of the spiritual materials I studied created a struggle for me, because the information initially seemed confusing.  It didn't see how it could add to the quality of my life, since I couldn't apply a whole lot of what I learned to make my life more peaceful.   I'd finish reading a book and think to myself  "What good is all of this going to do for me"?   Why can't anyone, give me simple answers or resolution, or the insight to help me understand what's going on? "
The best solution for me has been to process spiritual insights by meditating and internalizing.  I internalize information or impressions received by paying attention to my feelings.   I learned to recognize and trust those feelings, and take action on the feelings that have proven to be correct decisions for me. 
My search for the truth has guided me to form new opinions and beliefs about the mysteries of evolution and spiritual gifts.    I came to realize that I needed to master how to organize my thoughts about universal truth in order to apply spiritual principles to the problems, challenges, and opportunities, I face in life.  After many frustrating years and plenty of mistakes, I finally attained what I believe is a good understanding of the mysteries of universe we experience.   So, if you are feeling frustrated, and the people around are having difficulty understanding your desires to change, have patients, because we are all on different steps on the ladder of evolution and we are truly meant to help others along as we learn the gift of acceptance for ourselves and for the people who touch our life.